1. “Splitting of the moon” refers to Rihanna bending down to pick up her iPhone off the red carpet.
2. Dajjal’s Younger Brother, Larry, will follow him everywhere he goes, cackling incessantly.
3. When the ratio of women to men becomes 50:1, that creepy uncle will finally have a chance at marriage but somehow keep screwing it up.
4. Texting while praying will become common.
5. After his resurrection, Isa’s (as) first miracle will be ridding the world of Candy Crush invites.
6. Gog and Magog are, in fact, a boy band whose world tour will destroy mankind as we know it.
7. The Great War between good & evil will take place entirely in online comments.
8. When the sun rises from the west, everything will reverse and Muslims will start showing up early to everything.
9. When the trumpet sounds, Lou Bega will immediately be resurrected to sing one last performance of Mambo #5 before being damned eternally to hell.
10. If this article gets a million likes, we’re all doomed.
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