BERWYN, IL – Late yesterday afternoon Convention Marriages Incorporated (CMI) announced their fourth marriage successful marriage arrangement, making them one of the most successful Muslim matrimonial services in North America. Co-owners Habib and Bisma Akthar issued a press release that was generally ignored by all local-area newspapers.
“We’re disappointed this event isn’t gaining more press coverage. Maybe we should bomb something,” stated Mr. Akhtar with a nervous chuckle.
The Akthars bought CMI five years ago after previous owners arranged three marriages in 15 years and count their own marriage amongst CMI’s four total marriage arrangements to date.
Mrs. Akhtar stressed CMI has a competitive advantage by stating, “We have such a huge selection of individuals to choose from. Ages range from 4 to 97, so I believe that people have a lot of choices from our candidate pool.”
CMI anticipates a flurry of activity to take place in the near future and is rumored to be pursuing a possible fifth marriage arrangement sometime in the next decade or two.
“If thing keep going as well as they are we’re thinking of going IPO,” exclaimed Mr. Akthar. “Our research leads us to believe we can keep this incredible pace for some time to come.”