Islamica News News You Can Lose

Confused residents refer to Daud as a modern-day "Jekyll and Hyde."

Quiet Muslim Woman Secretly Rageaholic on Road

Patterns Noticed, Many Fearful

DEARBORN, MI – Parents at a local Islamic School were given a rude awakening last week in the form of screeching tires on a 2005 Lexus RX-330 SUV. The aggressive driver, identified as 29...

Four green turtles help you out after you dismiss your four green turtles.

LotaCorp introduces ‘Istinja Turtles’ Lota

Nothing gets you cleaner than 4 green turtles joining in on the action!

SUNNYVALE, CA – Riding the wave of this summer’s blockbuster release, LotaCorp (NASDAQ:’LOTA’) unveiled its new ‘Istinja Turtles’ style lota. Four eager, heat-transferred turtles (of the mutant variety) are ready to take on your...

Masheen's beard is sunnah, but the rest of his story is far from it.

Incompetent Jihadist Contemplates Career Change

Struggling to Find a Cause, Group

MADISON, WI – Six months after being dismissed from a local terrorist group, former IT worker and part-time jihadist Saleem Masheen is thinking it might be time to change focus in his search employment....

2014 'Imamapalooza' headliners announced. This year's event is expected to draw a record-breaking crowd.

ISNA Unveils Lineup for 2014 ‘Imamapalooza’

Tickets Expected to Sell Out Quickly

DETROIT, MI – The ISNA rumorville came to a halt on Monday, as it released this year’s Imamapalooza lineup. Die-hard fans of the festival will be pleased to hear that Hamza Yusuf will once...

Some recent, scattered tweets from the imam.

Area Imam Tweeting Way Too Much

Followers Beginning to Regret Their Decision

ANYWHERESVILLE, VA – Last week after Friday prayer, Shaikh Khalid Mabuti asked members of his congregation to follow him on his newly registered @ShaikhMabuti Twitter account. Several days later, many of those followers are...

When pressed for comment, Stewart was confused given that no prior conversation with the imam had taken place.

Retiring Imam Selects Jon Stewart as Successor

Hamza Yusuf To Call it Quits "In a Few Years"

BERKELEY, CA – Ending years of speculation, Celebrity Imam Hamza Yusuf announced his retirement “in the next few years” and selected Jon Stewart as his successor. “I feel proud of all that we’ve been...

Halalcohol's new 'TAK Beer' is expected to be a great hit amongst the beer-deprived.

Halalcohol Introduces ‘TAK Beer’

And 'TAK Beer Lite' For Moderates

ST. LOUIS, MO – Time to get your spiritual buzz on. The company that brought the world halal alcohol ten years ago, is again revolutionizing the industry with the unveiling of ‘TAK Beer.’ Ismail...